Friend Zoned

So I had a second date with ‘9 Second Man’at the weekend.

We went to this cool board game bar (my choice), where you can play any of the multitude of board games they have on the shelves in there. We had fun playing board games for a couple of hours, so much so that I forgot we were on a date. When we were leaving and deciding to go for a coffee afterwards, I was suddenly thinking…ahhh I haven’t even thought about what I want to happen with this guy. I kept thinking…………he’s attractive….he’s nice…..but I don’t know if that’s enough?

There seems to be no special formula for dating. I thought originally you had to feel a ‘spark’ on the first date, but I’ve since found that not to be the case, sometimes it grows. So what wasn’t working here? Is he too nice? Do I need a bit of naughtiness (yes!), do I need someone who is going to take the lead at times (surprisingly maybe!).

So we went for a coffee and as we were both starving we also then had dinner. I realised somewhere along the line, during our two dates I’d friend-zoned him….but why? I think because he was nervous….(I like guys who are confident)…because he didn’t really flirt and he didn’t always rise to my flirty comments over Whatsapp……and because there wasn’t enough banter for me.

I’m lucky in that I don’t tend to get friend-zoned much myself. I think it’s because I talk about sex too much and I am a flirt. I’m no oil painting, but I am quite confident.

So he was disappointed when I told him…..but so was I. On the plus side, I think I’ve made another friend….and we need friends more than we need boyfriends right?! 🙂


Date With ‘9 Second Man’

So I went on a date with a new guy the other night. We had been chatting for a while. We seem to have a lot in common. He loves cats and he works in a caring job role, with children.

We met up at an ice cream parlour (my idea). It was nice. We chatted lots…had a coffee and then went to a nearby bar for a few drinks. There wasn’t a lot of flirting though. Should I expect flirting on a first date? He is very nice and he’s attractive….I’m not sure if he isn’t a bit too nice though? Makes me think….what am I looking for? I wonder if it’s because he didn’t really flirt with me. There wasn’t really any banter and there were no innuendos. I think he was nervous….I don’t usually go for guys who get nervous.

Anyway, I’m going to go on another date and see how I feel after. One date is often not enough, but two is often when you know if it’s a no no.